1 in 1000: The Only Muslim in Town

2 06 2007

muslimwomansittingalone.jpgBeing the only Muslim woman in town is lonely. You feel like you would love some sisters to invite to tea or to share your experiences with, to go shopping with. You long to be able to just jump in your car and drive minutes to the Masjid. You can join as many online women’s groups as you like and  it will help fill in the gap some; Although, you will still be left wanting, more. Online relationships are one thing but a tangible person sitting with you, talking with you, laughing and sharing with you is, well, real.

When I first converted to Islam I was in this very situation. The whole town consisted of maybe a thousand people and I was the talk of the town. Every outing I made was a spectacle. You could see all the other women whispering and staring. The men glaring. At the time it was more or less hurtful. Though, looking back now I can find humor in it.

I had many instances of people thinking I am a foreigner. For some reason, the hijab automatically makes people assume you are foreign.😉 They would be amazed at my grasp on the English language and probably thought I was a genius for getting their dialect down perfectly.

During my years spent in small town, America I realized just how cruel some people could be and at the same time how beautiful and open people can be. You see some days I would go out and get a smile and a conversation. Somedays, I would get people who were honestly just curious about me and my way of life.I figured it was the will of Allah that I landed in this town as the only Muslimah. Ultimatley, I began to open up more to the non Muslim women in my neighborhood. I began to take them small gifts and when I did I noticed something amazing. I came to realize that being the only Muslim in town could be an excellent opportunity for da’wah (educating and calling to Islam) if you embrace it. I realized that instead of sitting in my house alone, pouting because I couldn’t find any Muslimah friends, that I should just go out and try to make the best of it.

Only after I came to this realization and began interacting with my community did I learn of four other Muslim families in the next town over. Mash’Allah, after all this time searching, once I came to terms with my situation, I found the Muslim women. I’m sure that it happend this way for a reason. I did begin going for brunches and teas with these Muslim women. We would sit and talk and go shopping. It was every bit as wonderful as I had imagined. However, I continued my involvement in the community and continued having the non Muslims for lunch or taking them cookies or small gifts as well. So, then I realized that I had double the pleasure. I had the pleasure of dispelling some of the myths related to Muslim woman plus I had my Muslim sisters to go to for support.

Insh’Allah, when we moved away from that small mountain community we left more people who were educated about Islam than when we arrived. That is a great accomplishment and one that does not come without the Decree of Allah. May Allah guide us all. ameen.

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11 responses

2 06 2007
nor

assalam’kum

i have gone through the same situation, but no more now. i find the secret to solve this problem….jemaah prayer. you just do prayer in jemaah whenever you get chance…just try, hen you will see the difference. nowadays, i dont feel lonely at all, i find everyone (especially muslimah) being very friendly and can see a smile on their face. even if you dont find good people, but dont give up in our ibadah, just continue do our part. Insya Allah, there will be a way of life shown to us to enjoy the life in this world. Pls forgive me if i said anything wrong. you can share with me anything if you wish at my email address: nordeen1607@yahoo.com.my i’m from Malaysia, female age 34. and still single. i’m looking for good relationship with muslim people…:)

2 06 2007
southernmuslimah

Wa alaikum Assalaam Wa rahmatullahi Wa barakatuhu Sister Nor,

Apa Kabar?🙂 Jazak Allahu Khairan for checking out my blog. Yeah, it was lonely because i was the only muslim woman in the town. The closest masjid was 2 hours away. But Alhamdullilah now we have moved to an Islamic community.

Mash’Allah i have heard Malaysia is a beautiful country! So nice to meet you. Insh’Allah I hope to get to know you better.🙂

3 06 2007
carimuslima

Mashallah sis….. You’re always so optimistic one of the reasons I’m glued IM’ing you on google all the time. LOL
You always remind us how something that may seem to be a downer is actually a blessing in disguise. Jazak Allah Khairan for posting this. We really have best of both worlds and inshallah you straightened out lots of the misconceptions non-Muslims have about our precious Islam and views of women in Islam. Lots of hugs🙂

4 06 2007
adikbongsu

May Allah Bless You with His Strength, Love and Nur Iman always… 🙂

4 06 2007
asma

salam alikum sis
mashallah a very nice blog..May Allah Bless u Always..Inshallah.
keep up the gud work sis…

4 06 2007
southernmuslimah

Assalaamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu,

Thanks for checking out my blog.🙂

May Allah bless you and always keep us all on the Qur’an and Sunnah.ameen

4 06 2007
Umm Layth

wa `alaykum as-Salaamu wa rahmatullaahi wa barakaatuhu

You definitely look at things very positively. It’s the healthiest thing in our times. : ) Nice blog btw!

5 06 2007
UmmFarouq

Assalamu Alaikum!
Wow, great name. 🙂

Hope you stay strong on the path and continue to learn and grow as a Muslimah.

5 06 2007
southernmuslimah

Wa Alaikum Salaam Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu Umm Layth and Umm Farouq
lol…….thanks Thanks for checking out my blog! Insh’Allah i hope to see you around more. I really enjoy both of your blogs!
May Allah also keep you firm on the path of Islam and continue to help you learn and grow. ameen.
Jazak Allahu Khairan.

10 06 2007
Asiyah

as’salaamoo alaykum,

this blog was right on time! I’ve been feeling very lonely these days and longing for a good, strong friendship and connection with another sister. Even though there are quite a few muslims here in Bham, Alabama and I have several friends, I haven’t found the bond I’m longing for with anyone in particular.

I have six children and strongly believe friendships are needed outside of married life, even if the husband is a best friend. I’ve been pestering my husband to move to another community in the hopes of finding a more tight knit community/sisterhood. Your blog has given me inspiration to not totally write this one off. I can’t say though that I still won’t be looking elsewhere but at least your blog has helped me remember to at least continue to make an effort to work at things where I am now.

17 06 2007
Maha Abdo

Assalamu alaikum,

I feel this way when I go visit my parents. They live in a town with 2,000 people and I’m pretty sure I’m the first Muslim ever to step foot in there. I dread seeing anyone I used to go to school with because I know how it will go. I feel like it’s my “dirty little secret” and I know I have nothing to be ashamed of. I just know how these people are (I grew up with them) and don’t know if I could handle it. And my parents still have to live there amongst them. I think some of my Mom’s friends still don’t know I’m Muslim yet. Anyway, I’m glad I don’t have to live there and I give my kudos to you sister for being strong. I know exactly the challenge you’re up against! Stay strong and may Allah make it easy for you and reward you immensely. I don’t think I’d have the strength for that.

And I totally agree that as soon as you put on a scarf, you are relegated to the foreign class of society. I have heard people expressing their surprise at my English skills, and even thinking they heard me have an accent. (Well, maybe a Midwest accent, snort.) I have had professors ask me if I’ve passed my ESL test (English as a Second Language). And these people are supposed to be smart! Actually, professors can be pretty dumb sometimes in my experience. And people start talking slowly and loudly to you… Sigh. What can ya do?

Wassalam,
Maha

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