The Epidemic of Adultery

5 06 2007

divorce1.jpg

Why is cheating so alluring? These days you see celebrities left and right cheating on their spouses. Cheating isn’t reserved solely for the celebs though. In fact, this phenomenon is so common that they even have an infidelity home testing kit available now. It is a worldwide epidemic that has been raging since the earliest centuries of mankind.An epidemic that has not left the Muslim world unaffected.

Why would a Muslim want to cheat anyway? For the man he can have up to four wives. By the way contrary to popular belief Islam did not institute the practice of polygamy. Check out the bible:

King Solomon is said to have had 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:3) Also, king David is said to have had many wives and concubines (2 Samuel 5:13).

Islam simply limited the number and put a few conditions with it such as fairness, equality, etc. Contradict this to today’s christian sects which abuse polygamy in most cases.

“If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with them, then only one” (Quran 4:3).

“You will never be able to do perfect justice between wives even if it is your ardent desire, so do not incline too much to one of them (by giving her more of your time and provision) so as to leave the other hanging (i.e., neither divorced nor married). And if you do justice, and do all that is right and fear Allaah by keeping away from all that is wrong, then Allaah is Ever Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [al-Nisaa’ 4:129]

the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in the hadeeth narrated by Abu Hurayrah: “Whoever has two wives and gives one of them preferential treatment, he will come on the Day of Resurrection with half of his body leaning.” (Narrated by Abu Dawud, 2/601; see also Saheeh al-Jaami’, 6491).

“Live with them (your wives) on a footing of kindness and equity. If you dislike them it may be that you dislike something in which Allah has placed a great deal of good” (Quran 4:19).

” A believing man must not hate a believing woman. If he dislikes one of her traits he will be pleased with another” (Muslim).

For the woman if she has a reason to not want to be in the marriage then she can get a divorce. Ok, so now you are probably thinking, “What is this sister promoting divorce?” The answer is, “no, no, no.” All I’m saying is that Islam gives the woman the option to divorce if she has a valid reason. The woman’s divorce must be obtained by going to the Imam and presenting her case before him. The key word is “valid reason.” If you don’t have a valid reason the Prophet(saw) said: Any woman who divorces for no reason will not smell the fragrance of paradise…(Ahmed).

Look at these examples of sahabi(Muslim women living in the time of the Prophet(saw)).

Yahya related. to me from Malik from Yahya ibn Said that Amra bint Abd ar-Rahman told him from Habiba bint Sahl al-Ansari that she had been the wife of Thabit ibn Qays ibn Shammas. The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, went out for the dawn prayer, and found Habiba bint Sahl at his door in the darkness. The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said to her, “Who is this?” She said, “I am Habiba bint Sahl, Messenger of Allah.” He said, “What do you want?” She said, “That Thabit ibn Qays and I separate.” When her husband, Thabit ibn Qays came, the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said to him, “This is Habiba bint Sahl. She mentioned what Allah willed that she mention.” Habiba said, “Messenger of Allah, all that he has given me is with me!” The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said to Thabit ibn Qays, “Take it from her,” and he took it from her, and she stayed in the house of her family.

Narrated Ibn ‘Abbas: The wife of Thabit bin Qais came to the Prophet and said, “O Allah’s Apostle! I do not blame Thabit for defects in his character or his religion, but I, being a Muslim, dislike to behave in un-Islamic manner (if I remain with him).” On that Allah’s Apostle said (to her), “Will you give back the garden which your husband has given you (as Mahr)?” She said, “Yes.” Then the Prophet said to Thabit, “O Thabit! Accept your garden, and divorce her once.” (Bukhari Book #63, Hadith #197)

Other religions however, don’t give the woman the right to divorce. Oh, the secular nations give the woman the right but not their religion.  It is a horrific shame that the Muslim countries are the ones who end up denying the woman her rights that Islam specifically gave her centuries before the western world caught up. But that is another topic for another time.

In Islam the person who cheats (MAN OR WOMAN) in Islamic countries would have a severe punishment. This is the case in every religion. Islam didn’t invent punishment for adultery or fornication.

If a man is found sleeping with another man’s wife, both the man who slept with her and the woman must die. You must purge the evil from Israel” (Deut. 22:22).

“If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to death” (Lev. 20:10).

“And come not near to unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily it is a faahishah (a great sin) and an evil way (that leads to Hell unless Allaah forgives)” [al-Israa’ 17:32]

“And those who invoke not any other ilaah (god) along with Allaah, nor kill such person as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse and whoever does this shall receive the punishment
[al-Furqaan 25:68]

Ubadah ibn as-Samith t (Radhiallahu anhu, meaning: May Allah I be pleased with him) narrated that Allah’s Messengerr said: “Receive (teaching) from me, receive (teaching) from me. Allah has ordained a way for those (women). When an unmarried male commits adultery with an unmarried female (they should receive) one hundred lashes and banishment for one youar. And in case of married male committing adultery with a married female, they shall receive one hundred lashes and be stoned to death.” (Muslim, Hadith 4191)

 

Remember though, to convict a pair of adultery there must be four witnesses.

 

“And those who launch a charge against chaste women, and produce not four witnesses (to support their allegations), flog them with 80 stripes; and reject their evidence ever after: for such men are wicked transgressors.” (Qur’an 24:4)

Or if the husband or wife catches the other one cheating and is unable to produce four witnesses then they may do lian(mutual swearing). For more information on this see Maliks Muwatta: Chapter on divorce.

As you can see In Islam there is a clear solution for the problem of infidelity facing the world today. A problem that indeed spreads many diseases and erodes the moral fabrics of society. Diseases such as: HIV/AIDS and venereal disease. Perhaps a far greater side effect of infidelity is the fact that families are ripped apart, trust is lost, and the person’s reputation is ruined. May Allah save all the Muslims from this. ameen.


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5 responses

5 06 2007
carimuslima

As Salaam Walakium Sis,

This is so true adultery has no religion, race, or social discrimination. It exists in backgrounds and social classes. Great reminder sis…. I also liked the way you pointed out how so many Christians like to argue about polygymy in Islam as if this was something new, and Islam does the opposite it came to limit it. Jazak Allah Khairan for sharing this. Hugs😉

6 06 2007
adikbongsu

Salam sis,

here’s the link again…

http://badriyah-ummi-almujahidah.blogspot.com/

btw i love reading ur entries… 🙂

6 06 2007
adikbongsu

Looking at poligamy…it actually helps to protect the woman and her future offsprings by making it legitimate.

As for those women who become mistress…they are the losing party cos their status are not recognise and they are viewed negatively by society….

but such is the world now….newspapers do not condone keeping another women as mistress as much as they should. Instead they love to attack poligamy …and all because they are ignorant. 😦

22 06 2007
Hakim

“Why is cheating so alluring?”

I think men and women, particularly in the West suffer from boredom. People are bored, life is boring and we all know what happens when our minds and hands become idle. Idle minds and corrupt social values is an ugly mix.

5 07 2007
vinayak

Hi
Nice interesting… post that was.
See another related news below

<A HREF=”http://o3.indiatimes.com/mera/archive/2007/07/05/4716950.aspx
“>http://o3.indiatimes.com/mera/archive/2007/07/05/4716950.aspx</A&gt;

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